5. Vincent Black Lightning - Richard Thompson
Red hair, black leather, and good motorcycles. Makes for an exciting relationship, but only for a little while.

4. Ellen and Ben - Dismemberment Plan
The last track on their latest is a catchy, jangly departure from the tone of the rest of the record. It also bears the distinction of being the only tune on this week's list in which nobody gets wasted.

3. Lily, Rosemary and the Jack of Hearts - Bob Dylan
Better writing in under 10 minutes than the combined output of Philip Roth. Faint praise aside, Dylan here at peak form. What actually happens in the song, you ask? C'mon, don't ruin it.

2. Millie Pulled a Pistol on Santa - De La Soul
Along with Prince's Another Lonely Christmas, one of the songs about Christmas you are least likely to hear around Christmastime.

1. Frankie and Johnny - Traditional
He was her man, and he was doing her wrong. Folks have been singing this tale for long time, few as convincingly as Doc Watson.